The love and lies of Rose Weasley
by Sahitya Poonacha
Summary: My secrets, my ambitions, my dreams, my foolishness, my fears, my weaknesses, my friends, my family, my wounds, my memories, my scars, my fights and my true love.
1. Chapter 1

_When you think it's over and you've done enough_

_remember_

_You always have more to show_

_And more to give_

_When you think life is tough_

_Remember_

_That life is an art_

_And to master it_

_You need to learn how to live_

_ -By SPHP20896 _

**CHAPTER 1: Rose Weasley **

Have you ever felt as if your life has hit a standstill?

As if someone just applied the brakes in your car and it's just stopped moving forward in this case the car is your life?

If you have not then you're just one of those lucky people.

But unfortunately I have felt like that and my name is Rose Weasley and I am not kidding, my life is not as clear-cut as most people make it out to be such as my best friend Lianna and my cousin Al.

People think I'm smart Rose Weasley who knows where her life is heading, determined to get she wants.

But really all that is just non sense, I have high expectations to live up to, of both my father and my mother.

Nobody has asked what I want in my life, it's always been "Rose will be this when she grows up" It's never been a choice I've been given.

Nobody cares about what my heart wants, who _I_want to date, or who _I_ want to love.

I haven't told my parents that I am dating Scorpius Malfoy, for obvious reasons I must not have to explain. The Weasley-Malfoy grudge is a legendary one.

I lay there on my bed the seventeen-year old me, I was worried, what if my parents found out?

They would be very mad.

I don't why it's a big deal, my Dad likes Scorpius but I don't think he'll ever want to see me date him.

I love Dad, but I love Scorpius too.

I was desperately waiting to get back to Hogwarts so I could see Li and Scorp again.

Someone knocked on my door, I said absent-mindedly "Come in"

My brother's red-head appeared on the other side "Come for dinner Rose"

I sighed "I will Hugo"

He nodded and closed the door.

Hugo was a nice enough brother to have, like all boys in our family he was obsessed with Quidditch, was a ladies' man, enjoyed playing pranks and had a sarcastic sense of humor. He was tall like my Dad, had the same hair and nose, but he didn't have the freckles or the eyes, he had my Mum's intelligent brown eyes, and as that was said he was intelligent.

Me on the other hand had red bushy hair, my eyes were blue and I had the trade-mark freckles, but neither was I tall nor did I have the long nose.

I swung my legs over the side of the bed and walked to the door.

I walked silently into the dining room and took my seat at the table next to my brother who was busy going through an inconspicuous letter.

I asked "What's that?"

He jumped and stuffed the letter away, he blushed "It's just…you know…a letter"

I grinned "From?"

He rolled his eyes "When you know the answer why do you ask the question?"

I shrugged.

He asked quietly "Have you got any letters from…um…Scorpius?"

I whispered "Actually a few, but tomorrow I'll see him at the station"

Suddenly Mum asked "What is the little secret?"

I blushed; Hugo came to my rescue "Nothing Mum we were just discussing something that Lianna had told us to keep a secret"

Mum smiled.

She called "Ron! Come for dinner!"  
>We heard footsteps and my father appeared at the door grinning "Let's start on this food then"<p>

My mother shook her head and sat down in her seat, she served dinner for all of us, and Dad told us about some random story from work.

Our family dinners were very talkative and we all had to pitch in, but I was very silent and my mother noticed she asked "Rosie is everything alright?"  
>I said "I was just thinking about Li's secret"<p>

She asked "Is it something we should know? We can help her if she wants"

Dad added "Yeah, if it's something very important let us know Rose"

Hugo avoided looking at me he just continued to eat.

I said "No Dad, it's nothing great, Al and her had a disagreement"

I made a mental note to apologize to Lianna later.

Mum laughed "That's nothing to worry about, dear, your father and I have a lot of disagreements and we're still together, it's good to have arguments they increase the depth in the relationship, you know once…"

She told us some story about Dad and her.

I was honestly not in a mood for it.

After a dinner filled with forced smiles and silent eating, I retreated to my bedroom where I could breathe without worrying about my secret coming out.

I heard my mother knock and enter as I lay down to sleep that night.

She came and sat on the edge of my bed, she tucked a stray hair behind my ear "You'll be off to Hogwarts tomorrow"

I looked up at her and she continued "You've grown so much, you've become so beautiful, your father and I are proud of you Rose. And I want you to enjoy your last year at school, don't worry about the exams, just enjoy the year, I know that we have always had high expectations of you but really I have thought about it and I have come to a conclusion, it's your life, live it the way you want, whatever you do we'll support you but just always do the right thing and be happy. Never have regrets Rose, never have regrets"

She was crying, I sat up and hugged her "I will be happy Mum, I won't have regrets, promise"  
>I felt so happy she had said that, she was truly the best Mum in the world.<p>

Lily and I had always fought about who's Mum was better and we'd end up not talking to each other for a day.

To her, Aunt Ginny was the best Mum, Al and James always agreed, but I realized later that everyone thinks their mother is the best and I couldn't blame my cousins for thinking their Mums were the best.

Mum pulled away and said "Good night Rosie, sleep well, tomorrow will be the beginning of something new"

I nodded "Good night Mum, I love you"

She smiled and kissed me on my fore-head "I love you too Rosie"

She got up and left the room after giving me another smile.

I slept very well for the first time in many nights that night.

**AN: I'm back! With a new plot, some old characters, new emotions, new point of views and a new story.**

**Enjoy this story, it might have a lot of emotional instances but it is what it is, the story reflects a few feelings I have on a daily basis though I am not in love.**

**Never forget to review, and I really hope you enjoy this one.**

**Fingers crossed!**

**Thanks again for all the support,**

**I will update soon.**

**See you soon!**

**SPHP20896:)**


	2. Chapter 2

_Don't look back_

_Always be proud_

_Because you know_

_How far you've come_

_You know_

_What you have become_

_If life gets tough_

_Remember_

_Brace yourself_

_For the worst to come_

_But always know_

_You are your own strength_

_Your own hope_

_And your own help._

_By-SPHP20896_

**CHAPTER 2:**

I woke up in the morning and got ready for the day. I knew I'd get to see Scorpius and Lianna.

I was not nervous, but I felt sick as if I was going to throw up, and I didn't know why.

As I pulled my vibrant hair into a ponytail, I realized how much I'd grown.

Of course not physically because I was still a short person, but I definitely felt older, confident and mature.

Going to Hogwarts was always a very rushed but organized affair in our house.

I pulled my trunk down the stairs with a lot of difficulty, it was so heavy, Li always told me not to carry too many books but I always refused, now I felt the weight of the trunk.

I had no idea how this year was going to be but I had a vague idea that it might be very much like a dream.

I still hadn't figured out what I should tell my parents and I thought it better to talk to Scorpius first.

When I got into the car's backseat, next to Hugo I asked "Prepared for this year?'

He looked at me and sighed "I don't know actually, I mean you can't really predict OWLs can you?"

I nodded.

Mum said "Don't worry Hugo, they are not quite hard, they're pretty simple"

Dad totally disagreed "Your Mum is talking about herself, but for the rest of us who aren't gifted with absolute intelligence, it's pretty sickening and makes you frustrated"

Hugo and I exchanged a grin.

Mum said "Don't listen to your father, he has a habit of exaggerating"

Dad argued "I'm not exaggerating I'm just saying the truth Hermione, I can't feed the kids some stupid tales about my OWLs"

Mum said "You don't have to get them worried"

"For merlin's sake! Do you want me to say that I had a blast during my OWLs, want me to say it was amazing and I had a lot of fun? In my dictionary _that_ is an exaggeration"

"Oh Ron! Don't flatter yourself, you haven't even read the dictionary!"

The argument continued all through the journey.

When we got to the station we put our trunks and our Owl cages on our trolleys and made our way towards the barrier.

I ran through the barrier and managed to bang into someone.

The person was Albus, he swore "Bloody hell!"

Aunt Ginny reprimanded "Albus, language"

He said weakly still rubbing his legs "Sorry Mum"

Aunt Ginny came up to help me, she helped me put my trunk back onto the trolley and move away so I could avoid collision with Hugo.

Aunt Ginny smiled, with her brown eyes shining. Aunt Ginny was always pretty, and so was Lily.

Albus said "Hey Rose"

Hugo came through the barrier and said "Mum and Dad are still arguing"

Aunt Ginny said "Let them be, they'll stop soon enough"

I asked "Where's Uncle Harry?"

Al answered "He'll be here soon, he had to go to the ministry in the morning"  
>Hugo asked "Then where's Lily?"<p>

Aunt Ginny "She went to greet Lysander"

Al muttered "To snogg him more like"

Hugo and I grinned, Aunt Ginny glared "Don't you dare give your sister a hard time this year Albus, I'm warning you"

He rolled his eyes "I have better things to do Mum"  
>A male voice said "Yeah he'll be snogging Lianna while Lily's busy with Lysander"<p>

Al blushed as Uncle Harry appeared followed by my parents.

Al said "Thanks Dad"

Uncle Harry replied "Your welcome Al"

I always found Uncle Harry very heroic, not just because he was Harry Potter but he just was and Al was the same, James was more easy-going but he too had that brave thing going for him.

Dad asked Uncle Harry "Harry? Did you find your OWLs simple and not frustrating?"

Hugo said "Merlin!"

I said "Not again Dad!"

Uncle Harry looked confused but he replied "Actually I found it quite the opposite, extremely frustrating and very pressurizing"

Dad looked satisfied he said childishly "See Hermione? I told you didn't I? We're just being truthful, there's no point giving the kids a false impression"

Hugo said exasperatedly before Mum could react "For heaven's sake please stop this, I know how hard the OWLs are, and I also know that I don't have to worry so just stop the barking!"

Al looked amused, Aunt Ginny was exchanging a look I didn't quite understand with Uncle Harry, they both looked at each other with something that told me it was private and I looked away because whatever it was, it was between them.

Al said in my ear "I saw Scorpius"

I looked up at him, Al had to stop growing, it was getting intimidating.

I asked quietly "Where?"

He said "He was talking to his parents"  
>I nodded.<p>

Just then Mum asked "Oh Al! I forgot to ask, is everything fine between Lianna and you? Rose told us you had a bit of a disagreement"

Al looked at me questioningly, Hugo was blushing, Uncle Harry and Aunt Ginny looked surprised, but they waited for him to answer.

I just blushed and looked up at him apologetically, he looked from me to Mum "Yeah, but it's fine now, I apologized"

Dad said "It's always the men who have to apologize"

Mum said "You're an exception to that rule"

Dad blushed and the rest of us laughed.

Al looked at his watch and said "Mum I think it's getting late, we should get on to the train"

Aunt Ginny started asking "Where's Lily? She might miss the train!"

Just then Lily came up running "Oh! You all are here! I came to see why you're not on the train yet"

Al hugged his Mum "Bye Mum, take care, I'll write soon"

Aunt Ginny said "Don't forget to, and take care of your sister"

I turned away from the Potters to my family, my Dad pulled me into a hug "Take care Rose, your mother must have had told you some…uh…things yesterday night and I feel the same way, enjoy your year Rosie"

I nodded and gave a brave smile though I felt like I was going to faint.

I hugged my Mum and waited for Al, Lily and Hugo, Aunt Ginny and Uncle Harry also gave me hugs wishing me all the best for my final year.

As we got onto the train Al grabbed me by the shoulders as I lost my footing because I felt dizzy. Once I was upright again he asked me concerned "Are you alright Rose, you look sick?"  
>I answered weakly "I'm….fine"<p>

His emerald eyes narrowed and he said "Let's find you a place to sit"

We found Scorpius in a compartment all alone.

He smiled when he saw us.

He gave me a hug and said "I missed you"

I said closing my eyes my dizziness evaporating immediately "Me too"

Al smiled and put our trunks onto the rack.

Scorp pulled away and took me to a seat, he asked Al "Where's Lianna? The train's going to leave soon"

Al looked concerned "I don't know, I'll wait at the door"

He ran out of the compartment and Scorp said "I hope she makes it, she's head girl isn't she?"

I nodded "And Al's head boy"

I felt the train start to move, I said "I'm going to check if she's here"

Scorp nodded "I'll come too"

We walked towards the main entrance of the train, we saw Al yelling "Lianna run!"

We heard her yell back "I am running you fool!"

I resisted the urge to laugh.

She reached just in time so that Al could catch her hand and pull her onto the train.

She was breathing heavily, for a moment both Al and Li were lost in each other's gaze.

Scorpius was shaking with laughter behind me, I elbowed him and he whispered "Should we say something?"

I nodded and Scorpius coughed loudly.

Al heard us, so did Lianna, Li looked at me and blushed, I just smiled knowingly, Al blushed and said "Um…uh we should head to the front cabin, we're the Head girl and Head boy aren't we?"

Li nodded without saying anything.

Scorpius laughed and I glared at him.

Scorpius asked "Want me to take your trunk for you?"

Li nodded and handed it to him.

Scorpius headed back to the compartment.

Lianna said shyly "Uh….Al…um….you're still…well…um…actually.."

Al sit had his arms around her waist.

I said rolling my eyes "Merlin! Al let her go, you still have your hands around her"

She blushed deep red and Al blushed as well.

He said "So I'll head there and start, you come when, you're ready"

She nodded.

He headed off.

I asked "Why are you two still so awkward, you've dated for about two years"

She said "I guess we are not used to Public display of affection"

I said teasingly "Excuse me, really?"

She blushed "Okay fine, maybe not, but we just prefer not to be caught like this"  
>I laughed "Go on to the Prefect's cabin, we'll talk later"<br>She nodded and smiled "See you soon"  
>I nodded and walked in the other direction.<p>

I saw Scorpius waiting for me.

I sat beside him and he said "Hey"

I replied "Hey"

I had already lost myself in his grey eyes.

He smiled "So, how was your summer?"

I sighed "I had to conceal the thing about us, I hate lying and you know it, I can't lie for nuts Scorp, we need to tell them soon or I might just go mad"  
>Scorp said "You know what, I told my parents"<p>

I looked at him wide-eyed.

I gasped "What?"

He looked at his hands "Yeah, Mum was happy, Dad didn't mind but he did say it wasn't you he had a problem with but it was the family"

I asked "How do I tell my parents then?"

He seemed to be thinking "We'll figure something out, for now forget it"

I said "I feel so bad"  
>He pulled me closer to him "I know Rose, I know"<p>

I asked "Do you think we'll be alright?"  
>He nodded reassuringly "Yes, I do think we'll be alright"<p>

I smiled.

The rest of the morning we spent talking about our summers and random things.

When the trolley came we took as much food as we could so we'd have enough for Lianna and Albus who seemed to have disappeared.

After sometime Lianna came and flopped onto the seat.

She said "I'm starving"  
>I smiled and tossed her a chocolate frog which she grabbed out of the air, like the chaser she was.<p>

Scorpius asked "Where is Al?"

She said through a mouth full of chocolate "I don't know, he disappeared after patrols, he said he'd be here soon"

Scorpius said disbelieveingly "he's your boyfriend"

She shrugged "I know, but what can I do?"

She looked as if she was alright but she was nervous and a little upset.

Al entered the cabin and said "Finally"  
>He sat beside Lianna and put his arm around her shoulder.<p>

She continued to eat as if nothing had happened.

Scorpius asked "Where were you?"

He answered "Checking on Lily"

I asked "Why?"

He sighed "Mum's orders"

Scorp shook his head.

Lianna asked sharply "What's the matter with you?"

Al asked confusedly "What do you mean?"

She said "Forget it"  
>Then I remembered what day it was, it was Lianna's birthday and he had managed to forget it.<p>

Scorpius asked "What's up with them?"

I whispered back "It's Lianna's birthday"

Scorpius said "Oh! Al is so dead"

I replied "She doesn't really care for birthdays but she never really gets a lot of attention from her family and that's why I always try to give her that one day before we come to school because she doesn't like every one knowing, but Al is apparently an exception"

Scorpius snorted.

Al asked "What's wrong?"  
>Lianna said "Actually I'm going to…..go"<p>

She got up and left.

Al looked at me for help "Did I do something wrong?"

I smiled sympathetically "Al it's her birthday"

Al's eyebrows widened and he swore "Damn!"

He got up and left the compartment his robes flying behind him.

By the time we'd reached Hogsmeade Lianna had gotten back to her original mood.

Al had managed to console her. Scorpius found it funny.

When I saw the castle I felt confident, this year would be good.

I'd make it good.

I felt Scorpius's hand in mine "It'll be our best year at Hogwarts"

I nodded "It will"  
>I took a deep breath and walked towards the castle.<p>

**AN: Okay I've updated! Finally!Forgive me if there are any mistakes in any point of this chapter, I wrote this one in the middle of the night and I have been sleep-deprived for the past few days. **

**Please review! **

**Will update as soon as possible.**

**Enjoy it!**

**SPHP20896:)**


	3. Chapter 3

_Let it all go_

_Leave it all behind_

_What's happened has happened_

_Move on to a new day_

_A new journey_

_And a new story_

_But never say_

_You've lost_

_Mistakes are made_

_So you can learn_

_Recklessness _

_Is the law of life_

_No one's perfect_

_We learn that _

_In the course of time._

_By-SPHP20896_

**CHAPTER 3:**

I lay on my bed in a daze in the morning. My head was whizzing with thoughts of the day before.

Lianna came and sat on the edge of my bed "Good morning"

I said "Good morning"  
>She asked "Are you alright, since yesterday you seem detached?"<p>

I sighed "I don't know Li, I don't know what's happening to me, I just feel so lost and aimless"

She said "Well Rose, I am going to tell you this, every time I come to Hogwarts I leave my summer behind, I can't think about the people who hate me when I'm surrounded by people who love me. So, if you had a bad summer, let it go, why do you want to waste the whole year because of two bad months, you need to be happy Rose, and you need to let go, be yourself"

I got up and said "I know but it's not easy"

She nodded "Nothing's ever easy, and that's why we have friends and family to help us make things better"

I asked "How do you know this?"

She smiled "My sister told me, my parents and my sister are the only people in my family who really care and love me"

I asked "Why didn't you ever tell me all of this?"

Her features looked strained "I couldn't Rose, I couldn't talk about it to anybody, the first person I told was Al, and then as I spent time with him I found a renewed confidence that I couldn't find in myself"

I said "I feel the same way with Scorpius"

She smiled "I know, and that's why you'll be able to tell your parents only when he's there with you Rose, you won't be able to do it alone, you need him"

I nodded "I know…but how?"

She looked like she was thinking "I don't know how he told his parents"  
>I sighed "He's always been brave"<p>

She pulled me into a hug "You're in Gryffindor for a reason Rose, and I know you're brave, you just need to see it in yourself"

"That's the problem I can't see it"

She said confidently "We'll help you, Scorpius will help you, _I _will help you"

I smiled "You know I'm really lucky to have you"

She laughed "You are, I agree"

I whacked her with my pillow.

We went down for breakfast and slipped in next to the boys.

Al asked Lianna "Ready for the year to start?"

Lianna smiled "Yes, right Rose?"

She looked at me significantly, I gave an uncertain smile "Yeah….sure"

She smiled.

Scorpius asked "Do you three know who's Quidditch captain this year?"  
>Al rolled his eyes "Shut up Goldilocks we all know who it is"<p>

Scorpius ignored Al and said "Me!"

Lianna though she was laughing said "Congrats Scorp!"

I hugged him and kissed him on the lips "Why didn't you tell me?"

He scratched the back of his head "I forgot"  
>I laughed.<p>

Al said "You're going to have to have try-outs, Emma, James and Fred have left, we need two chasers and a beater"

Scorp nodded "I know, I'm thinking of Lianna taking try-outs for Chaser, since she's the expert and I'll choose a beater"

Al nodded "I know Lily wants to try-out this year"

Li smiled "That's great! She must be really good"

Al shrugged "yeah she's pretty good, I've watched her play but she can do with some help"

Li said "I'll be glad to do that if she's willing"

Al smiled "I'll tell her"

We spent the whole day in classes, without James the castle seemed pretty silent. Li and I found solace in the astronomy tower as the boys were busy doing homework.

Li asked me "Don't you feel like this year is already getting boring on the first day?"

I nodded "You're right"

Li said after some time "We should do something"  
>I asked "What do you mean?"<p>

Li said "I want to make this year huge, and I want to do it our way Rose, I don't want a stupid ball or something I want it to have more meaning, something that will make us remember it forever"  
>I said "I want that too Li but how are we going to do that?"<p>

She smiled a knowing smile "I've got the best idea ever"  
>I asked a little scared but also interested "What is it?"<p>

She bent down and said in my ear "We'll give the boys a surprise"

I asked impatiently "What is it Li?"

She said "I need some help with that Rose"

I shook my head "So you don't know what we're going to do but you want to do something?"

She nodded blushing.

I said "I don't know either"  
>She said "We'll come up with something"<p>

I nodded "we will"

She came running to me the next day in the corridor "I have an idea"

I sighed "What is it?"

She said "what if we can take them into the Forbidden forest"

I said "Li, the whole pint of calling that forest Forbidden, is because it's Forbidden"

She wrinkled her nose "I like adventure"

I rolled my eyes "Li, we have to make this year memorable, maybe with romance and candles and…"  
>Lianna cut me off "Rose, all that's cheesy and over rated"<p>

I said "No it isn't"

She said "We need to do something that _they_ will like, and they're blokes Rose, _we_ are the girls, _we_ might like all that, but _they_ won't"

I said giving up "It's all yours then"

She glared at me "I'm not doing this for myself you know, it's for all of us, and I think you're being a little selfish Rose"

I asked "What? I'm not being selfish! I just don't want to get in trouble Li!"

She said sharply "Exactly, but sometimes taking a risk isn't a bad thing, a risk that makes you happy is an opportunity, of course _you_ don't know that. You're so afraid of getting in trouble, you forget what matters to you most. Loosen up! Trouble's not always bad, especially when you're getting in trouble for something you love and makes you happy"

She just walked off leaving me there alone and weak.

Whatever she had said wasn't just about the forbidden forest, it was about Scorpius and me, and the worst part that hurt the most was that it was true. I was so afraid my parents would be mad I forgot that Scorpius made me happy and I loved him, no wonder he was able to tell his parents, he loved me and I made him happy and he took a risk and it paid off.

Me? I had let the chance slip, I was too scared of getting in trouble, Lianna was right, I was being selfish, I wanted my parents to think good of me and I wanted Scorpius to be mine permanently but I had to deal with the fact that sometimes you can't have everything.

I cried, sliding down the length of the wall.

I cried for so long.

And no one came to find me, maybe if I had said the truth to my parents about everything.

I had so many chances to tell them and every time I chose to keep it inside me and it grew to the point that now there was no way of escaping it.

It hurt so much that I couldn't breathe.

It was my own fault, it wouldn't have been so huge or big if I had told them in the first place, why hadn't I?

That was because I was afraid of failing my parents expectations.

They wanted me to be huge to be great and I could imagine their disappointment in me.

What would they say when I told them I didn't want to be an Auror, a person in Magical Law enforcement, Quidditch player or a Curse-breaker, what if I told them I loved Scorpius Malfoy. My parents always wanted me to work well in a well-paid job and all that and marry a perfect boy. But I didn't like any of those career options, I just wanted to become a healer, and they always told me that it was good to get into the ministry and all that. They never really liked the idea of becoming a healer.

I was hurting like mad, anger and sadness burned me.

I had said so many lies to every one and now the weight of it all fell on me.

I didn't know how much longer I could go on like this.

I had made my friend mad at me for being selfish, I'd disappointed my boyfriend by keeping our relationship a secret, my parents were only seeing an illusion and were living a complete lie and my cousin was probably disappointed that I was being so stupid.

Why me?

Nobody cared anymore, nobody had any patience left, they all were giving up and eventually I'd fade into an invisible being and I'd loose everything I loved.

**AN:**** I love this chapter even though it's a bit sad.**

**Poor Rose, well why don't you review and let me know how you feel?**

**By the way, this story isn't going to be like the others with a lot of easy-going humor and very family oriented.**

**It's going to be pretty dark and a little emotional.**

**Not because I planned it that way but because I've been feeling like that for sometime now.**

**Thanks for the support and the reviews, I really appreciate them!**

**Might take me some time to update, sorry!**

**I'm very busy with schoolwork, and my sports.**

**Well keep reviewing! And enjoy the story!**

**SPHP20896:)**


	4. Chapter 4

_When you think the battle's over_

_You're only lying_

_The battle's never over my friend_

_And you should never give up_

_You cry when no one is looking_

_And you smile when they look_

_But no one sees you hurting_

_They don't know_

_Because it's an illusion they're seeing_

_When you tell them _

_They will understand_

_And when you won't tell them_

_You can bid goodbye_

_To a helping hand_

_So don't be afraid of loosing_

_All that you love_

_The stakes are high_

_Make a choice that you feel right_

_And leave the rest_

_To the heavens above_

_That's the battle_

_Between you and the world_

_It'll never be lost or won_

_ It'll go on and on_

_And will never be done._

_-BY SPHP20896_

**CHAPTER 4:**

I didn't know how I woke up in the morning leaning against the same wall.

I was wearing the same uniform, my hair was a mess, I could still feel the salty tears on my face, my books were scattered around me.

I collected them one by one and looked at my watch, class would start in five minutes and it was charms.

Thank god I had my bag.

I grabbed everything and ran not caring how hopeless I looked.

I reached the class out of breath and Flitwick said "Ms. Weasley, come in, you are a bit late but I'm sure we can forgive the mistake this time"

I entered the class saying "Sorry Proffessor, it won't happen again"

I took my seat at the back of the class far away from Lianna, Scorpius and Albus, I couldn't face them right now.

I didn't pay much attention in class and I could feel Lianna's eyes burning holes into my head, I could feel Scorpius's anger and questions from far away and I could also feel Al's curiosity strangling me.

I sprinted out of class at the sound of the bell.

I couldn't breathe and I could also feel the tears rising once again.

I walked bravely to the next class and the next and the next, until it was lunch.

I grabbed some food as quick as I could and went down to the lake.

For some reason I had started feeling claustrophobic in the presence of my friends and family, whenever around them I experienced waves of guilt washing over me and drowning me in a sea of emotions.

I was partially glad the day was over by the time I had to go to bed.

This was not the life I wanted to lead.

But when you miss your chances and opportunities you end up living a life that is close to a nightmare.

That night I couldn't fall asleep. It wasn't by choice, Lianna was on the ned next to mine, she looked peaceful.

She was so lucky, she had the perfect dream come true story to tell people.

I walked to the astronomy tower as silently as I could.

I remembered our first year, when I had met Lianna on the train, then she was a shy, out-of place girl with big brown eyes and princess hair, she had been tall and skinny but at the same time she looked as if she could throw a mean punch.

She had always been hyper, I had been a snobby know-it all kid.

Lianna always found ways to live life well always balancing homework and Quidditch, never caring about the minor details like me, she had been so full of energy, also, she loved magic so she always topped in all classes with ease. But what made her my instant best friend was her ability to stand up for what she believed in.

That girl barely cried, almost never, but sometimes I had seen her crying maybe once or twice. She taught me how to have fun and do all my work without upsetting either, I was glad she was my best friend, I couldn't have asked for a better one.

Al had always been my favorite cousin, everyone always thought Lily was but it was actually Al.

It wasn't because we were the same age or that we both liked books, it was because he understood me like none of my other cousins, apart from Lianna he was the first one to know that I liked Scorpius.

Al was amazing at everything he did, he was extremely smart and he was warm-hearted. As kids Al and I would compete in everything. He's exactly like his father and every time any of us would tell him that a sudden pride would take over his features, Al looked up to his Dad with a kind of idolistic nature I don't think I've seen anywhere, but Al knows who he is, he doesn't blindly follow in his Dad's footsteps he analyzes all the pros and cons and always manages to find the right road to walk on.

Al had always been a mediator between James and Lily, both very talkative, eccentric and spirited, Al was silent, smart and watchful, everyone expected him to be in Slytherin considering his personality but he ended up in Gryffindor, he had told us "The sorting hat said I would do well in Gryffindor"

Al also held some kind of charm and a knight in shining armor demeanor that had girls tripping, he always had a polite tongue to say sorry, please and thank you, he also had looks that had girls swooning whenever I told him that he'd blush and tell me to shut up.

But along with the six-foot two frame, excellent build, messy black hair that fell into his emerald eyes, killer smile and a personality that could have a lasting impression came an anger that could scar you for life, Al rarely got angry but when he did it was better to run for cover preferably in another country.

Scorpius was the best thing that ever happened to me, he wasn't like anything that words could describe. He always calmed me down even when I couldn't be calmed.

All I ever wanted from him was love which seemed to take a really long time to get.

Nothing about him was fair to me, his good looks, his amazing personality and his family, they all had some effect on me either negative or positive.

I had never expected to fall in love with him, never.

I always treated him like I didn't know him for the whole of first year, Scorp always treated me with a polite attitude and a shy nature as if he was afraid a war would break out if he smiled at me.

But that's exactly how it was, if anything happened between us that was remotely close to liking each other it meant war, but then we made the biggest mistake by falling in love.

I wish it didn't have to be like this.

Scorp was such a good person no one could make me happier than he made me.

Scorp was my support system and no one understood that.

Now everytime I thought about Scorpius, my heart ached with a kind of guilt and longing that drove me mad.

But no matter how much I wish for things to change they never would.

His blonde hair and his grey eyes are a perfect combination that make him so enchanting, and his lean but muscled built give him a kind but firm look, his smile that always make me jump and his ever lasting charm that melts my heart made it impossible to forget the guilt in fact it just doubled the emotions.

He had always been even-tempered, always knew when to react and always relied on his heart to make important decisions.

I wish it were that easy for me.

And once again I was thinking of myself, and Lianna's words were extremely true, I am selfish, everything I thought till now was not about them but it was about me though I was speaking of other people, how their actions, personalities and beliefs affected me.

As I cried once again, a hand gripped my shoulder.

I looked up to see Lianna standing there looking sad and guilty, she said "I'm sorry Rose, I shouldn't have said all that"

I shook my head at her "No, you were right, all of it was true, whatever you said was true, it was me who caused my own problems, I've got to stop thinking of myself and think of both of us Scorpius and me, we're one not two separate people"

She sat down beside me "I felt so bad"  
>I said "You didn't have to, I felt guilty that I had let all of you down including my parents"<br>She hugged me "No Rose, you haven't, we are proud of you"

I said "No Lianna don't cloud my thoughts"

She looked extremely torn up " It's all my fault I put some stupid things into your head and now you believe them"

I said firmly "You didn't do anything Li, if anything you helped me realize what a mistake I'd made, now I know lying is never a solution, if anything it adds to the list of problems"

She sighed "I hope you know what you're thinking Rose"  
>I felt the tears slip "I've learnt a few things Li but I have no idea how to execute them"<br>I broke down in front of her, She took me in her arms "Shhh, it'll be alright, I'll help you, Al will help you and so will Scorpius, don't worry, stop crying Rose, it'll be alright"

I said through my sobbing "No, please don't tell Scorpius"  
>She was silent and after sometime she said "I don't know if that's right Rose but until you're ready I won't tell him"<p>

I cried "I need to do this alone, if I tell him I won't be able to think properly"

She asked "Why are you crying?"

I answered "I just feel so bad and so hopeless, like I can't breathe, it's killing me, my life is a mess, it's not perfect like yours"

She pulled away from me and shook my shoulders, her eyes looked angry "Stop being stupid Rose! How can you think my life is perfect, my family hates me, I'm an out caste, I'm a freak, you're telling me my life is perfect! I thought you had more sense than that! Natalia Zabini is after my life not yours! You're not the one called gender-confused every single day, you're not the one who feels like creep every single day in your life, you're not told you have no future almost all the time, you're not the one who has to struggle to find a grip on your life every summer, you're not the one who was bullied and tortured as a kid in school, you're not the one who wishes she could be invisible most of the time, you're not the one who had no hopes until she got introduced to something in fairytales, you're not the one who has to be told every day that you are a heart less crazy girl who needs to see a psychiatrist, you're not the one who has to get disgusting looks from everyone in your family, you're not the one who's life is falling apart in front of her eyes, my parents fight most of the time because of me my sister has given up on me ever fitting into the family but she'll never admit it, she's having her first kid soon and my family is saying that they hope more freak blood doesn't run in my family. You're telling me my life is perfect! Never think your life is bad Rose, be thankful that you don't have to deal with what I have to deal with, you have boyfriend problems, that can be sorted if you have support from your friends if you tell your parents and your career option will be fine, as for the lies, they can be sorted with a nice explanation and a sincere apology. My problem has no solution!"

I saw things from her perspective, my problems seemed diminished, here I was complaining about something that could be easily sorted with apologies and explanations while hers would continue for the rest of her life and she couldn't do a thing about it.

I said "I'm sorry"  
>She said glaring "You should be"<br>I had stopped crying "I'm going to tell my parents"  
>She asked "When?"<br>I answered "When I go home for Christmas"  
>She softened "I'll support you"<p>

She smiled "Feel better?"  
>I nodded.<p>

I felt confident "I'm going to do it Li, I'm not going to lie anymore, I'll tell them the truth, I'll explain to them, I'll do what I have to"

She smiled "I knew you'd come through"  
>I said "And I hope things get sorted for you"<br>She didn't say anything and she looked into my eyes like she was scared I said "I don't know how I can help but…."

She flung her arms around me "I don't want you to do anything, just be my best friend for the rest of my life"  
>I smiled "That will be done whether you like it or not"<p>

She asked pulling away "want to go to bed?"  
>I nodded "I would like that"<p>

She smiled and stood up "We'll get through won't we?"  
>I raised my hand and said "We will"<p>

She gave me a high five and we walked to our dorm brave enough to fight Voldemort.

(Okay maybe not that brave, but so what?).

**AN: Fourth chapter people! Well this one's a little more optimistic isn't it? Tell me!**

**Thanks for the reviews by the way, really appreciate them and enjoy reading them.**

**Keep reviewing :D**

**Fifth chapter should take some time to write, sorry.**

**Humor's sort of back in the next one, that's the good news.**

**I don't know exactly what I'm going to do in the next chapter so...Yeah, that's the bad news.**

**But don't worry it'll happen.**

**Thank you so much!**

**SPHP20896:)**


	5. Chapter 5

_Pick yourself up_

_Dust yourself off_

_What's over is over_

_Forget what's behind you_

_And enter the future_

_Don't cry over the past_

_When you have a future to live_

_Forget those bad times_

_Instead embrace the good_

_That the future will give_

_Walk forward with your head held high_

_You've nothing to be afraid of_

_You have nothing to hide_

_See the sun shine_

_Along with your smile_

_When the clouds disappear_

_All that's left is the blue sky_

_You've turned the page_

_And have lifted the pen_

_For a new story_

_A new chapter_

_By – SPHP20896_

**CHAPTER 5:**

When I woke up in the morning I felt like I was starting all over again, for the first time I was actually confident and the feeling brought a smile to my face.

I now knew I had a chance to make everything right.

Everything was going to be fine.

And the sun agreed with me.

Lianna said "Wow, it's a happy morning isn't it?"

I nodded "It is"

We walked together through the empty corridors of the castle towards the breakfast waiting for us in the great hall.

The big windows let the sun shine through and cast tall shadows on the floor.

Even the ghosts were cheerful.

It was supposed to be monsoon and the sun was shining brighter than it ever would any other day.

Lianna asked me "Is it just me or is everything and everybody happy today?"

I answered smiling "I don't know but I'm not worried"

She nodded.

We reached the great hall to loud chatter and voices.

This was one good Saturday morning.

Every one sounded excited and cheerful.

Scorpius greeted me with a questioning, polite and uncertain smile. I greeted him with a hug "I'm so happy today! You wouldn't believe it!"

He laughed "I am glad you are"

I was really grateful that he didn't bring up the disastrous week I had.

Albus looked at me confused, Lianna reached up and whispered something in his ear.

He looked down at her, smiled then nodded.

I looked away, she was probably going to tell him later when they were alone.

Scorpius pulled away and said "Are you hungry?"

He was already filling his plate with food.

I nodded and grabbed some food for myself.

Lianna said "I have a plan today"

I rolled my eyes "Not the forbidden forest"  
>She frowned "That was not my plan, but seriously what is your problem with that forest?"<p>

I said "It's against school rules"

It was her turn to roll her eyes "And we are so good at following school rules right?"

I said "You're a head girl and Al's the head boy, it would be a very irresponsible to do any such thing"

She thought for a second "But that also means we're smarter and can get us out of trouble, and there's no guarantee that we have to be caught"  
>She took a sip from her orange juice, I always founded arguing with Lianna a waste of time and energy because she always managed to win.<p>

But I wasn't going to give up "Do you know what's in that place? Giant spiders and all sorts of dangerous creatures"

She said teasingly and I knew what was to come "Face it you're scared that's all, you're not worried about rules that's just an excuse, the truth is you're scared of spiders"  
>I blushed "No I'm not! What gave you that ridiculous idea?"<p>

The note of hysteria in my voice didn't help my sorry plight.

The smirk on her face warned me that I was asking for it. Her expression turned into a thoughtful one "Let's see, first year you ran out of our dorm screaming your head of because you saw a spider in the bathroom, Second year you saw a spider in my garden and you said and I quote 'Lianna let's get out of here there's a spider in your garden'

Third year you managed to wet your pants because Hugo threatened you with a spider, fourth year once more you got scared of your april fool's prank a rubber spider, fifth year you woke up in cold sweat terrified that a spider was hunting you down to find you and kill you, don't forget sixth year when there was a spider in your bathroom and you couldn't get out because someone had locked it with magic…"

"Stop! Okay fine! I am afraid of spiders! SO what? You're afraid of Lizards and frogs aren't you, want me to give you an insight into that particular part of your life?"  
>She blushed "Sorry sorry, no need to start about that"<p>

I gave her another glare, Al and Scorp were laughing their heads off.

Scorp said "I think your fear of spiders is cute"  
>Al laughed harder.<p>

I said "Thanks, I thought you'd find it weird"  
>Before he could say anything Al said "Same here"<p>

Scorp whacked him over the head "Shut up Al"

He said cheekily "Or what you're going to set a spider on my tail?"

Lianna laughed into her bacon.

Scorp hid a smile and I just glared, Scorp came to my rescue "At least my girl friend's not afraid of Lizards and frogs"

Lianna protested "Hey! In my defense, those are slimy sneaky creatures that are more repulsive than Al's vomit!"

Scorp and I couldn't help it we started laughing, Al asked her defensively "What!"

She looked apologetic and blushed deep red "Sorry, but Al your vomit _is_ repulsive, I've had a very horrible experience with it"

He looked very upset, Scorpius said "Well that backfired nicely on you Al"

Al threw a sausage off the platter set in the centre of the table into Scorpius's open mouth saying "Eat that Goldilocks"

Scorpius looked very offended, but he waited to chew the whole thing before saying "Stop calling me that"

Al said simply taking a bite of his bacon "You wish Goldilocks"

Lianna said "It suits you"

I agreed "It does Scorp"

Al smiled "There, your girlfriend finds it nice, what can I say I am a genius!"

Scorpius glared at him.

I defended my boyfriend "At least he isn't a pushover"

Li said "True"

Al asked her "Are you my girlfriend or what?"

She asked "Want me to lie?"

He said "Thanks for the support"

She just smiled and kissed his cheek "It's not a bad thing to be a pushover, it has its advantages, for me of course"

Al rolled his eyes and sighed "I'm sure, any way, I'm going to head to the library, you three coming?"

Lianna said "I need to finish my defence essay, I'll come"

Scorpius said "I don't think I will"

I said "neither will I"

They nodded and left.

A sudden idea struck me, I leant towards Scorpius and whispered in his ear.

His eyes lit up and he looked at me "Are you sure?"

I nodded and grinned.

He smiled "Amazing, let's do it"

I laughed.

This was going to be fun.

**AN: Rose is up to something! What are you waiting for? Review!**

**I'm hoping you liked the story so far.**

**I've got some ideas for the next chapter but it'll take me time to update.**

**My mum's after my life, so it'll be some time before I update.**

**Sorry.**

**Anyway all your job is, to read, review and enjoy it, the rest is my problem :)**

**See you all soon!**

**SPHP20896 :)**


	6. Chapter 6

_You finally see the world_

_In a new light_

_You're still unsure_

_But you're done with the fight_

_Now you can walk_

_On your own feet_

_Without tripping_

_Now you can talk_

_Open-minded and free_

_Without stuttering_

_You're more confident_

_Than you were before_

_You have something to live for_

_And finally you see who_

_You really are_

_BY- SPHP20896_

**CHAPTER 6:**

We quietly followed them into the library like a couple of spies.

We hid behind the shelves, across from their usual spot.

We stayed silent trying to catch whisps of their conversation.

Al's voice reached us from their table "I wish every morning was like this"

She smiled "I know, me too"  
>Al leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes "Coming to the library was just an excuse"<p>

She grinned "I know, I have finished my homework a long time back"

Scorp whispered "Those sly…"  
>"Shhh! They'll hear you" I reprimanded.<p>

Al laughed "knew you'd be done with it"

She said "You talk as if you never do your homework"

He countered "At least I'm not like you finishing homework three weeks in advance"

"It's a good habit, at least I get more free time"

"So what? You do double the work in one shot"

"You're lazy"

"You're crazy"

"Shut up"

"Why? Because I'm right?"

"No! Because you're an idiot"

"Whatever you say"

Lianna rolled her eyes.  
>Scorp asked "So this is what they do when their together? Argue?"<p>

I shrugged "They're good at it"

He shook his head "I'll never understand those two"

Al asked "So, you said you'd tell me about Rose?"

I almost stopped breathing, Scorp looked at me but immediately looked back in front, but I could see him paying attention.

Lianna sighed "Nothing, she's been feeling down for the past few days"

Al looked disbelieving "I know Rose, she wouldn't ignore us if she was feeling down"

Lianna said "Al I forbid you to ask her"

He asked "Why?"  
>She sighed "Al you won't understand"<p>

Al said "Try me"

Lianna got up "It's not my secret to tell, I'm going"

He asked "Why are you hiding it from me?"  
>She said "Because it's for Rose to tell not for me, if she wants to say then fine!"<p>

He said "I'm her cousin, and you are not allowing me to ask her either"

"Al, I don't want to talk about it"

"She's my cousin I need to know"

"She's my best friend I respect her"

"So do I but I have a right to know"

"You don't understand!"

"If you tell me I could!"

"I can't, she won't like it if I do, and she's not ready yet!"

She said lowering her volume "If you're her cousin you'll care enough to give her time and trust her enough to tell you by herself when she's ready instead of snooping behind her back"

Al's voice was deadly low "I am not snooping, I do trust her"

Lianna looked scared for a moment "I'm sorry Al I didn't mean to….."

"I'm going, I need to be alone"

Li burst out crying after he walked away, she sat down at the table and held her head in her hands.

I mad a move to go comfort her but Scorp put a hand on my shoulder and shook his head.

I looked back at Lianna and he took my hand and led me quietly out of the library.

We walked back to the common room and we didn't find Al in there, Scorpius checked in their dormitory but he wasn't there either, Al wasn't in the astronomy tower or in the kitchens, he wasn't even near the lake. Even Lianna seemed to have disappeared, she had left the library.

I felt so guilty, for listening in and for being the cause of their fight. Their first ever fight, they'd never fought before, a real fight.

I really hoped they didn't break up because of this.

When I aired my fear to Scorpius he told me "Don't worry, they're made for each other, they'll be back together in no time"

He didn't look as confident as he sounded.

I waited for lunch to see Lianna and she didn't show, neither did Al.

Where were they?

Then at around five o'clock Lianna entered the commom room looking like she'd been through hell.

Her hair was messed up and her cheeks were tear-streaked. Her eyes which were usually full of life were missing all the confidence they radiated, Her nose was red and her shoulders slumped.

I jumped up but Scorp caught my elbow and said "let her be, she doesn't need your questions right now"

But as he said this Lianna came and sat down next to us, I didn't say anything.

She said "I'm going home"

Scorp asked confused "What?"

She answered a tear rolling down her cheek "I blew it with Al, my last chance at happiness my only chance actually, I've decided I'm going home, I don't want to be here while he dates other girls and finds the one for him"

I stared at her, I couldn't say anything, I just listened "I screwed up Rose, I ruined everything, it's all my fault, if I hadn't been so rude, I could kill myself, he's never going to forgive me"

I said "Don't be stupid Al loves you"

Scorp nodded "You're getting ahead of yourself"  
>I nodded "Al's a forgiving type"<p>

She got up and said "I'm going to go find him so I can apologize for my stupidity, where is he?"

Scorp and I exchanged a look "We don't know where he is" I said apologetically.

She asked "Are you sure?"

Scorp said "Yeah we're sure"

Her tears started flowing again and she ran out of the common room her ponytail flying behind her.

I asked "What just happened?"

He shook his head "I don't know"

We waited for both of them or one of them to show up but we lost hope after it turned late in the night.

We fell asleep waiting for them to return.

In the morning I felt someone shaking my shoulder "Wake up Rose"

It was Al.

I opened my eyes and looked at Al, I rubbed my eyes and looked up at him from my position leaning against Scorpius's chest.

Al's hair looked even more messed up than usual and he looked sad I was suddenly wide awake "Where the hell were you!"  
>Al didn't answer, I stood up waking Scorp up in the process, I asked "Do you know how worried we were, How worried <em>Lianna <em>was? Do you?"

He asked "was she?"

Scorp answered "What do you mean was she, that girl was talking about going back home and how she'd ruined her only chance for happiness"

Al looked hurt "She couldn't be thinking all that"

Scorp who was still grumpy from being woken up said "Well she is you idiot"

Al asked "But why?"

I was about to answer but Scorp said before I could say anything "H-how are we supposed to know?"

Here comes another lie.

Al raked his hands through his already messy hair "Where is she?"

Scorp shrugged "She ran out of the common room when we told her we didn't know where you were, we've not seen her since"

Al swore "Shit!"

Scorp asked "Do you have any idea where she could be?"

Al answered "I might have an idea but I'm not sure"

I said "It's worth a shot"

Al nodded "Come on"

He led us to the grounds and to Hagrid's house.

I asked "Hagrid's house?"

Al shook his head "I can't tell you why"

Scorp asked "Why not?"

Al said "It's complicated"

We didn't press him to tell us more, instead we silently followed him to Hagrid's house.

When we knocked on Hagrid's door Lianna opened the door.

She rubbed her eyes and said "Come back later he's asleep"

Al said "Lianna…"

Lianna looked carefully and when she saw all three of us standing there she looked like a deer in the headlights, she asked "w-what are y-you doing here?"

Scorpius rolled his eyes "We've come to have Hagrid's rock cakes for break fast, what do you think we came here to do?"

Lianna asked Al "You told them?"

Al shook his head without looking at her, Lianna looked even more hurt when he wouldn't look at her.

Scorp noticed this and said "We _all_ need to have a talk"

We sat out side on the steps and Lianna asked "Where were you?"

Al didn't answer, Scorp whacked him "Answer your girlfriend Al"

Al looked like he could kill Scorp.

I asked "Al where were you?'

Al said "I-I-I ….went to the room of requirement"

Li's tears came streaming down "You worried…m-us to hell"

Al's eyes mirrored hurt.

Scorpius put an arm around Li's shoulder and said "Come on Li your turn to tell us where you were yesterday"

She sniffed "In the morning I was in the library, in the evening I went to the forbidden forest, where Hagrid found me"

I asked alarmed "Why did you go in there?"

She said "I don't know"

Al said "You know but you won't tell"

Li said "Again, it's my business, I don't need everyone to know"

Al stood up "We are not everyone Li, Rose is your best friend, Scorp also cares about you how can you hide stuff from them"

She asked icily "What are you to me then, you didn't say that?"

He said "That isn't the point"

She looked away from him "Al, if you want to know, I went into the Forbidden forest to do something that I can't tell you please try and understand"

He said "Well, it's the same thing we argued about isn't it, you just won't tell me"

She said giving up "If you want to know, ask her, don't ask me because she's the one who told me not to tell"

I looked down guiltily.

Al said "Look I don't want to fight alright"

Lianna said "I'm sorry I said….that"

He said "I know you were angry, but…I was stupid to get angry like that"

Lianna said "I never hide _anything_ from you Al but sometimes I can't you have to understand"  
>Al looked away "I just wanted to know"<p>

She said "You could have waited"

Al sighed "I'm going to the castle, I'll see you…all later"

Lianna said forcefully "Wait"

He looked at her confused, she asked "Al I want to know something. What have I done wrong?"  
>Al said "Nothing, I don't want to know what happened to her, I don't want to know why you went to the forest, because I don't care"<p>

Li closed her eyes "Al, you'll get the answers when it's time, I _can't_ tell you"

He said quietly "I just don't like being kept in the dark"  
>She jumped up and hugged him "Al you're not being kept in the dark, I've told you everything there is about me to tell and I want you to be patient, no one's hiding anything from you, trust me"<p>

He had eyes only for her "You're serious?"

She said "Yes, you fool!"

He smiled slowly.

Scorp shook his head "I'll say it again, I'll never understand these two"

I laughed and leaned against him, Scorp put his arm around my shoulder.

What he didn't know – The guilt was eating me up inside.

Al and Lianna kissed to mark the end of their fight.

When they broke apart, Scorp stood up pulling me up along with him, he said "Let's celebrate"

Lianna and Al laughed, arms still wrapped around each other.

Hagrid came outside and asked "What in the name of merlin's pants is goin' on out 'ere?"

Lianna and Al quickly stood straight and blushed, Scorp said "We came to take Li back"

Hagrid nodded and said yawning "Good good, why don' you three come in?"

We couldn't refuse, we smiled and entered the house.

Fang was excited, I scratched him behind the ear and he sat at my feet contentedly.

Hagrid bustled about his tiny kitchen as we sat around the dining table.

Scorp whispered "Oh no he's cooking!"

I whacked him and he said indignantly "Ow! What was that for?"

I said sternly "Be nice"

Scorp turned to Al and said "She's lost it"

Al who had been staring at a grinning Lianna who had no idea of it didn't respond.

Scorp rolled his eyes "Hagrid? Has anything new been happening around here?"

Hagrid brought us mugs of tea and a plate of rock cakes at which Scorp looked apprehensive.

He took his mug and sipped, Al, Lianna and I followed.

Hagrid said "Nothin' much, it's a lot more quiet now after your parents left the place, they were always up to somethin' or the other, always on their feet those three, would come to me for bits an' pieces of information, for some o' the other mischief they were upto"

He laughed and took another sip from his own mug.

Al smiled "We must be boring compared to them"

Hagrid smiled "No, yer, just as good when given a chance, all you four need is a chance"

Li asked "Is there any investigation we can do?"

Hagrid answered "You could try findin' out who stole one of my pumpkins"

We laughed, he said "Tha's the problem when you have parents who keep the world safe for ya, they take all the cool adventures and leave you with nothin'"

Al had a dreamy look on his face, Li too looked as if she was in her own world, both of them loved adventure it was a fact and so did Scorpius but he was more subtle about it.

Al, Li and I took a rock cake out of pure hunger.

Hagrid asked "Scorp not havin' my rock cakes?"

Scorp gave a forced smile and said "I was going to…"

He quickly grabbed one and smiled.

Hagrid who was satisfied said "Am thinkin' of givin' up this teachin' business, I'm a bit too ol' fer it"

Li said "You're not old Hagrid, Just look at Mcgonagall, remember Professor Dumbledore he was old and Slughorn, you're a baby compared to them"

Hagrid smiled "Thank you, but it's getting a bit too hard fer me Li"

It was silent for a moment, and we heard a loud crack.

It seemed to have come from beside me I looked at Scorp and he looked both in pain and guilty, he blushed and laughed "ha ha…"

Al was trying to hide his laughter, Li too was laughing.

I hid a smile, Scorp took another careful bite from his rock cake, the crunching sounded scary, Hagrid asked "Alrigh' there Scorp?"

Scorp nodded.

Al said "Hagrid, we need to head to the castle now, we've a lot to do today"

Hagrid nodded "Yeah you four better be headin' back now, go on then"

We got up Li hugged Hagrid "Thanks for yesterday Hagrid"

Hagrid laughed "My pleasure Li"

He ruffled her hair and let her go.

We waved and left through the door.

Once we were back to the grounds, Scorp groaned "My teeth"

We all laughed, he said angrily "Never again, never again….am I eating…that thing"

I put a hand on his shoulder "That's what you say every time"

He blushed, Al said "Goldilocks can't handle anything apart from porridge"

Scorp said "You…"

Al took off with Scorpius chasing him.

We watched them and followed them.

When we reached down to the Al pushed Scorp into the lake laughing and Scorp got out spluttering, he tackled Al into the water and thrashed around like kids.

We stayed under the tree watching and laughing.

Suddenly Scorp whispered something in Al's ear and both of them got out of the water and started coming over, Lianna and I exchanged a look she said "Run!"

We ran Scorpius was much faster than me, it wasn't fair, he caught me around the waist and said "Oh dear you're caught"

I squealed "Put me down! Now!"

Scorp said "Not happening"

He slung me over his shoulder and ran towards the lake, I felt him jump and we both plummeted into the water, I screamed and coughed underwater, I surfaced spitting out water.

Scorp was laughing, I said "Idiot!" But I was grinning.

I asked "Where are those two?"

Scorpius said "Not again"

We got out of the water and we tried to search for them, we found them behind the tree wrapped around each other, but not kissing.

Scorpius coughed, Li looked up and blushed.

Al asked sighing "What do you want?"

Scorp said "We had a plan"

Al blushed "About that…"

Scorp shook his head, Li laughed and pulled away "My idea worked, what can I say I'm a genius"

I asked "What idea?"

She smiled "Simple I distracted him from the 'plan'"

I said "Not fair"  
>she said smartly "At least I'm not drenched"<p>

Al asked dazed "It was an act?"

Li said thinking "Not all of it, most of it came naturally, I wasn't really acting"

She laughed, Al said "Because if it was that was some very good acting"

She smiled, Scorpius, Al and I exchanged a look.

Al and Scorp carried a screaming and protesting Lianna to the lake and threw her in.

She surfaced and gave us all a death glare "You idiots! Now I'm all wet"  
>Al told her "You look really gorgeous when you're wet" He winked.<p>

I could see the blush creeping on to her face.

Al continued "Some compliment that was"

She got out and looked at Al, he laughed.

She just walked towards the castle dripping head to foot in water.

We followed her laughing.

She turned to Al to say "You are gorgeous when you're wet you know, I wasn't lying"

She winked at him and walked away.

Al blinked and stopped laughing, he gulped and told us "She's some girl"

Scorp just laughed, I said "Never knew she had it in her to flirt"

I finally felt right and complete.

This is what I wanted this year, surprises.

Al and Li's first fight was a surprise though it wasn't a good one.

Li being able to flirt was a definitely a surprise that made me proud of her.

I wondered what more surprises I'd face.

But the guilt was still there, lurking in the shadows, waiting for the right time to attack.

Watching me with eagle eyes, ready to pounce when the time came, it was biding it's time to attack.

I could almost see it smiling it's evil grin warning me "Don't get too happy now, I'm still here, closer than you think"

**AN: Pretty freaky that last part, but I love this chapter, I'm proud of it.**

**Anyway sorry for the late update, I had absolutely no idea what I should do for this chapter but I did it! Yes!**

**It's a pretty long chapter to be fair. Please! Please! Please! Review!**

**I got the inspiration for this chapter from songs about love, I know, weird.**

**I'm sorry if I got Hagrid's talking wrong, you know it's a little hard to do but I thought it wasn't that bad.**

**So review.**

**Can't say when I'll update again, give me time, but please review, if you want more review, because I don't know how to go from here because I don't know whether you like it or not.**

**Thank you so much!**

**SPHP20896:)**


	7. Chapter 7

_Time flies by you_

_And you lose out_

_On precious seconds_

_And when you realize _

_It's too late_

_Chances come subtely_

_Not easily_

_And when you miss them_

_It leaves you guilty_

_You say you'll be ready_

_For the next chance_

_And you miss that one too_

_Every time you say next time_

_It's a tougher climb_

_The slope gets steeper_

_And the mist gets thicker_

_And before you know it_

_You've fallen down_

_And no one's there to help_

_Until a hand appears_

_And helps you up_

_The minute you stand _

_Your hands intertwined_

_The mist clears_

_The land's flat again_

_Walk on my friend_

_It's not yet the end_

_Every road has its bend_

_By SPHP20896_

**CHAPTER 7:**

Weeks went by so fast and I had gotten ten letters from my parents already.

And all times I had avoided telling them.

Life had taken a new turn, a more cheerful turn indeed.

Classes went on just like they always went without much of a hassle.

Professors constantly emphasized on how important this year was for us and I couldn't help but feel like they were taking revenge for all the years we made fun of them, irritated them and angered them. But that was no reason to give us enough homework for two months to be done in a week.

Magically somehow Lianna managed to keep up with the speed. She amazed me, how did she do it?

While the rest of us struggled through the weeks trying to finish our homework she was relaxed and just cheerful unfazed by the staggering amount of parchment that she carried with her all around the castle.

One night I saw Al almost ripping his hair out while he tried to do a potion's essay. It was hilarious except he looked ready to butcher anything within a centimetre's radius so I kept my mouth tightly shut.

Al never found potions hard or any subject for that matter but obviously this was one essay he was having major problems with.

Lianna sauntered in looking as if she'd been out in the cold, all wrapped up in sweaters and what not.

She must've been to the Forbidden forest again.

She came over and said "Hey Rose, why does my boyfriend look murderous?"

Al said with gritted teeth "This bloody #&^*** potion's essay, that's why I'm so #$%*&&& murderous!"

Lianna looked a little shocked and I had never really heard Al swear like that before I said "Al, calm down"

"I bloody well cannot! Who in frigging hell cares about mother#*&*** moon stones?"

Lianna put her hand on his shoulder "Why aren't you able to do it, it's pretty easy?"

He glared at the text book as if it had done some great personal wrong to him "No where in this sodding useless pile of shit I call a textbook mentions anything about frigging moonstones!"

Lianna looked through the text book and a slow smile came over her lips "Al, you're searching the wrong textbook"  
>He forgot his anger for a second and asked "What?"<p>

She showed him the cover, it said _The uses of potions in the modern world- Emily Wilkins_

I couldn't help but smile too, she placed the book on the table and crossed her arms waiting for an explanation from her boyfriend who was currently staring at the book blushing.

He looked up sheepish "Must've picked up the wrong book….."

He gave a shy smile Lianna raised an eyebrow "You missed the right book by a long shot Al, stop kidding where was your attention when you were picking out the book?"

Al blushed deep red "Actually…err….you see….Li…I was…sod it! You were there in the library at the time sitting there reading a book and you were next to this window and the wintry sunlight caught your hair wonderfully and you just looked so….divine, I just picked a random and made my way back"

Lianna looked amused, she pulled out her own essay from her bag and was about to hand it to him "Since you are so sweet, I'll let you take my essay"

Al reached out for it grinning and was about to take it when she suddenly held out of reach and said warningly "I trust you enough to know that you won't copy, just use it for reference, okay? I _will_ read yours once it's done got it?"

Al grinned "You know me, I'm head boy and I'd never cheat off you Li"

Li gave it to him and said over her shoulder as she walked away "And don't you dare share it with Scorpius!"

Al laughed and shook his head.

Scorpius who had been sitting next to me doing his homework waiting for Al to show the essay to him cursed "Damn! Curse you Al!"

Al just shrugged "Tough luck mate"

Scorp began working on his essay nicely cheating off me the whole time.

Just then an owl tapped against the window Al moved to let it in.

I recognized it as our family owl Athena she flew in and showed me her leg as she perched on the table amongst the parchment.

Al cleared it up to make space for her.

She held out her leg dutifully, I took the two letters, one addressed to me and the other to Hugo in my Mum's slanted cursive.

Once I had gotten the letters I stroked Athena and said "Go back home Athena"  
>It seemed like she frowned she probably waited for a letter to deliver to my parents, but I shook my head "Not today Athena"<br>She flew away through the window, Al shut the window.

I turned around and my eyes scanned the common room for my brother he sat lounging with his friends in front of the fire talking most probably about Quidditch.

I called "Hugo!"

He looked up and asked "What?"

I shook a letter at him "Letter from home for you"

He sighed got up and took it and said "You got one?"

I nodded holding it up for him to see.

He nodded and said "Great, now I'm going to my friends to talk about the brilliant dive by James in the match against the Canons, honestly, how Dad can still support that disappointment of a Quidditch team even now is beyond me"

I was not a Quidditch inclined person, but Al and Scorp always had something to contribute.

Al said still writing, he always was a multi-tasker "At least we know he's loyal"

Scorp said "But seriously that team is so useless, they lost everything centuries ago"

Hugo said "Whenever I bring up Dad's infatuation with the Canons, he turns a horrible purple that doesn't make him look at all attractive, but Mum always laughs and says how cute he looks and they both get this look and….., talk about mental images, dear merlin! Should not have brought that up! I'm going before I scar myself any more"

He walked away.

Al seemed to be laughing and looked faintly embarrassed at the same time and Scorpius looked a bit like a beetroot with blond hair and grey eyes.

Al said "The thought of Aunt Hermione and Uncle Ron going at it, no offense Rose is just….bad…I mean I know they're married and all but….it's not pleasant when you think about it"

Scorp laughed and I said "Whatever it's just as good as thinking of your parents"

Al blushed "Still it's a little less crazy and a little more imaginable than your parents"

"who said?"

"Everyone"

"And what is your definition of everyone may I ask?"

Al looked lost for a moment before he said "Uhhh Scoprius!"  
>He said "Don't bring me into this Al"<p>

I glared at him "But just so that we're clear what is your opinion on the matter?'

Scorp looked extremely taken aback "I prefer not answering…"

"You bloody well will Malfoy"

Scorp flinched and then mumbled "I think it's easier to deal with the thought of Mr. and Mrs. Potter"

I just glared at him and he slumped in his seat.

Al grinned "See I told you"

I turned to see Lianna heading over "Li! Is it easier to imagine my parents going at it or Al's parents?"

She looked shocked by the onslaught, Al gave her a wink, obviously being her boyfriend he would win.

She looked from me to Al, she said "Actually none of your parents going at it is imaginable, but just for the sake of answering your questions, it's easier to imagine the Potters"

I glared at her and Al stuck his tongues out at me.

Al said "In your face Rosie"

I said "Shut it Albie"  
>He hated being called that he said "Okay no need to pull that weapon"<p>

I said "I'll pull out any weapon I want"

He looked amused "Is this the way you treat your favourite cousin?"

I glared "What made you ever get that idea?"

Though he was right

He said mock-offendedly "You hurt me Rosie"  
>I rolled my eyes "Get over it"<br>He just ruffled my hair "You still love me"

I let a smile slip and he smiled back "Knew it"

I just said "Git"  
>and got back to my essay.<p>

I went up to the dorm and removed the letter.

I opened it leaning against my pillow, I unfolded the parchment and ran my eyes over it.

_Dear Rose_

_I hope school was good for you this past week._

_Well the Christmas holidays are coming closer and I was wondering if you were inviting Lianna to stay, I am sure both of you would like that._

_Your father doesn't mind and it doesn't hurt that she can always floo over to the Potters when she wants to meet Al. They make such a cute couple don't you think?_

_Rose, do you like anyone?_

_I know it's not in my place to ask, but you have never ever talked about boys or expressed your feelings for them openly. If there's anything that's bothering you you can tell me and I promise it won't reach your father's ears unless you want it to._

_Study well!  
>Write soon!<em>

_And your father sends his love._

_Love_

_Mum_

I read and re-read the letter, and only snapped out of the reverie when Lianna shut the dormitory door loudly.

My head snapped up and she said apologetically "Sorry!"  
>She came over sat on my bed and said "Rose I have something to ask you?"<br>I put the letter away and said "Go ahead"

She seemed nervous she played with the edge of the covers of my bed, I asked "Li what is it?"

She looked up to meet my eyes "I want to invite Al to meet my family this Christmas"  
>My eyes widened "What? Li that's great!"<p>

She smiled "Mum asked me to, anyway, there's something more, would you like to spend Christmas with my family?"

I couldn't believe it, in all the years we had spent together at Hogwarts it had always been me to invite her home never vice-versa.

I hugged her "I'd love that Li!"

She said "When you write to your Mum apologize that I am not coming over"

I nodded.

She disappeared smiling into the bathroom.

I got out some parchment and a quill.

I started writing

_Dear Mum,_

_I read your letter, school's fine like always although we have loads of homework though I didn't expect any less considering that it's our NEWT year._

_I know Christmas is coming soon and guess what Li invited me to go over to her place to spend the holidays along with her family, she also wants to invite Al so don't tell Aunt Ginny or Uncle Harry just yet, don't tell Dad either I'm sure he'll let it slip somewhere._

_Anyway that's all for now._

_By the way your dearest son is getting more Quidditch obsessed day by day more than he already is._

_Love Rose_

_P.S. I love Scorpius, Scorpius Malfoy._

I read the letter again and folded it.

I knew Athena wouldn't have gone home, waiting for my response so I threw opened the window and whistled loudly, Athena came flying and perched on the sill.

She stood still blinking waiting for a command.

I smiled and saw that a letter was already tied to her leg, this meant Hugo had written back, I tied my letter to her leg and said "Take this to Mum, not to Dad"

She frowned or maybe I was just imagining it, I just nodded, she flew off and I watched her go taking a deep breath.

Whatever happened here on would only be based on truth.

I watched the moon against the night sky, and the breeze took over, but this time there was not a sound of guilt no warnings no pain just a faint heart beat that seemed to be as happy and free as I was.

**AN: What do you think? REVIEW!**

**Merry christmas and a Happy new year in advance to you all!**

**I won't be writing for some time due to the holidays but there's a catch, if I get plenty of reviews I might just take out some of my precious time to write a chapter in the holidays, but if you aren't eager to know what happens next you can wait until I get back.**

**So I hope you guys are interested in this story and will review.**

**Happy holidays! :)  
>Enjoy!<strong>

**SPHP20896:) **


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